You are doing your everyday stuff – sipping on your morning coffee, working on your PC in office, or just travelling in your local bus or cab. Everything is exactly the same as yesterday, but only, it’s today. And then you freeze. You cannot move your pinky, or wriggle your toes. You cannot event blink your eyes, or open your mouth to let out a scream. You do not feel anything. You’re no longer sure whether time is ticking. Or you are breathing. Or you exist.
And then you feel a familiar moistness, warming the sides of your left cheek. It brings respite. You want to wipe it away, but you can’t. You urge it to dissolve on your lips. Fast. Faster! Slowly a darkness washes over you like rain clouds in the night of the sky. The tear seems to have lost its way. And then an overwhelming grief envelopes you. You shudder, as a surge of pain travels through you. It’s like the sharpest sword has sliced you into half, ensuring that every molecule of you is touched by the exquisite pain it brings.
There’s light again. And you move your eyes from the left feet to the right feet, from the left hand to the right. You raise your hand to wipe that tear that never served salt to your lips. But it’s not there. You lick your lips several times. But you taste nothing. Your two hands find both your eyes, but not that single, slow tear. You look around to see if someone saw your lost tear. But there is nothing out of the ordinary. You check the seconds hand on your watch and it is moving. Even then you bring the watch to your ear to listen to its ticking.
You are complete.
A complete incompleteness.
And a lost solitary magical tear.
You walk back home under the star laden night sky, breathing in the scent left behind by the rains. You smile and stop to admire the diamonds scattered on the pavement by the rich lady lamp-post. You suddenly realise someone has caught up with you. It’s only a shadow. You let your eyes pick up some of the precious jewels strewn on the ground.
“a” shadow? Shouldn’t it be “my” shadow? Your smile recedes. Your heart races. You throw away the diamonds and walk away at a faster pace. It matches your pace. You break into a run and sprint towards your home. You’re panting and soaking like you were dancing in the rain. Only there is no joy, just fear. You don’t have to look. You know it’s there. It’s just toying with you. Your home is far. And this thing, near.
You slowly turn around with your eyes closed to face it. You wait with eyes closed, forgetting to breathe. Seconds pass. Nothing happens. You breathe again. Your eyes still shut. And then you hear someone crying. Sobs interrupted by sighs and gasps. The voice is very familiar. It is your voice. You open your eyes.
You see it. It has your eye, your ear, your hand, your feet. But it’s different. It is incomplete.
“What happened to you?”, you ask.
“I have been sliced in half”, barely managing a reply.
“Where is the other half? Let’s find it and fix you. Us.”, you say.
“It’s gone. I cannot find it”, it replies bursting into tears.
You do not understand what’s happening. You are not crying but you taste your tears.
You embrace your shadow. After a minute or two, the sobbing stops.
“Alright let’s see what we can do to make you like me again”, you say.
You ruffle the hair, stretch it a bit, you try your best to build your other half. Slowly. Painstakingly. But with a smile.
“Alright, I think this should do”, you say.
“But I am faded, I am …”, it says.
“Maybe it’s what is making the skies darker so the star seem brighter”, you say.
We look up at the sky and smile at its twinkling eyes looking down on us.
“Will my other half return again?”, it says.
“Maybe. Maybe not. In this life or the next or another one”, you say.
“Where to you think it is?”, it says.
“Maybe it’s with a shadow that was as light as the day sky”, you say.
“Will we be ok?”, it says.
“I guess so. We will get used to you not being exactly me in time”, you say.